Random Thoughts For December

I guess this will be my last blog for this year. The pandemic is still surging high and people were just helpless because of it. This country is in shambles because of many political ideologies influencing the media and the people. In my observation, I guess we are going down.

I'm hurt to see that the two political parties are not in agreement because they just want to outdo one another and their pride was too high that no one wants to stoop down. It is a given that politics is always dirty. What people see is the crumbling of the foundation of freedom because the outcome of the recently concluded election was still in question because it was obviously rigged. People just can't believe that it happened right before their eyes.

People cannot do normally what they do before because of this pandemic. In fact the rate of infections according to statistics were already surmounting in that some of the hospitals and medical centers claimed that they were overly occupied and that the staff were all burnt out.

The vaccine for covid was already in circulation. I already had my first dose. In order to get the full benefits of the vaccine I still have to get my second dose in order to be 95% proof that the vaccine is effective. My next dose will be January 10. I can't wait that everything will be back to what it was before now that the vaccine were out and distributed.

Love is in the air.... lalalala… hahaha. I just can't imagine how time flies so fast. Before I was a naïve single guy who's routine was just house and work but now I'm totally pumped up that someone had inspired me in the field of love. I won't spill any details here but it's happening gradually, ok.

Work was been good. I had my share of ups and downs but the extra shifts was just massive. I saved a lot just in time for the tax season. I am glad I am that flexible. Thank God.

Random Booboos

It couldn't be denied that some times our days were laced with some upsetting situations, anxieties, accidents, etc. But no matter happens life must go on.

Here are some 4 situations during my recent travel in Mexico. These 4 experiences were not forgettable so I just wanted to share it with you guys.

No.1 - I was lining at the immigration when I arrive din Mexico City and it dawned on me that I left my passport at the seat pocket in front of where I was sitting at the plane. When it's my turn I anxiously told the officer that I forgot my passport and left it in the plane. He immediately called the crew of the airline which also radioed the personnel at the tube where the place was docked.

They searched inside and then radioed back that they have not found any passport. I told the officer to tell them that I left it inside the seat pocket in front of Seat 19F. Then 30 minutes later then radioed that they found the passport.

They let me wait at the waiting area and I waited there for 3 hours. Good thing I arrived at 4AM and it is still dark outside. And besides the check-in at the hotel starts at 11AM. I still have some ample time to wait.

I know how corrupt the immigration officer in Mexico. I was planning to bribe the officer with money but when he came back, he showed me my passport and then he stamped it and I'm ready to go. Good thing I did not let any money out or else it's gonna be another issue.

No. 2 - I left the immigration office and went to  the baggage claim area. The guy from the plane told me that my luggage will be in carousel 14. I went to carousel 14 and saw my bag standing alone at the corner. I went to claim it only to realize that one of the wheel was broken.

My luggage wheel was ruined and it looks so hapless. I was extra careful not to damage it more. But I know it is ruined and needs to be repaired. I was so devastated that it looked awefully ruined and I am worried what will I use when I'm coming back.

I pulled the bag to Gate 10 and waited for a taxi The taxi ride was fun and my bag was just resting in the trunk. When I got off at the hotel I am staying it looks okay and it is not really obvious that it is ruined. I will probably ditch the bag and buy another one when I go back to Los Angeles.

No. 3 - I called an Uber to the meeting place for our out-of-town getaway to Tolantongo. I left the apartment at 5:30AM because I don't want to be late. I punched  Jalapa 99 on the google map and then clicked it.

The driver was a male and middle aged who greeted me "Buenos das!" when I went in in the car. He continued driving to our meeting place. I was so excited for out trip so I didn't mind that he headed to a wrong direction.

When we arrived at the meeting place, I alighted from the car and tried looking for our tour guide. I noticed that the area appears like a residential area and there I panicked.

I looked for a taxi and begged to bring me to Jalapa 99 in Roma district. In the car, I called our host Aaorn and told him that I was dropped off at a wrong address and I was on my way.

The taxi drove fast and beat some traffic lights and we arrived just exactly on time and then we were off to Tolantongo. That experience was a nail biter to me. I thought I will not make it on time for our trip or else I will forfeit it. Good thing I woke up early and left the apartment early.

I had a blast that day at the natural reserve park.....

No. 4 - These happened during our Monarch butterfly journey. I woke up early as well and waited for my host at the street near my apartment. There were some constructions on the street and the traffic was really bad.

I was waiting when all of a sudden there's a big truck who stopped in front of the building to haul the stones that were dug it that day. They closed the street and I realized that there's no way the my ride can go inside.

I walked towards the corner of Peru and Chile and messaged my host that I am waiting there wearing a maroon jacket. I was standing there worried because I felt that I will be left off by the group because of the bad traffic.

Due to my anxiety I did not notice that my watery pooped had flowed out of my anus and then I felt that my pants and brief was wet with the stool. It is too late for me to go back and changed so I hold up my anal sphincter to prevent it from flowing. But when I feel my pants it was wet a little bit.

Then all of a sudden a blue car stopped in front of me and the driver introduced herself as my host for the day. She told me that I am the only client so we took off and I totally forgot about my wet pants.

New Preceptee

New beginning, new orientee on the ship. After the didactic sessions Charmaine told me that I will be training another new grad for orientation on the floor. I met the guy two weeks ago and we started our rapport quickly.

I toured him around the building, showed him where the purchasing office, utility room, supply room, linen room, ICU, OR, Pharmacy, Med rooms, the 3 stations, etc.

Then I showed him where the assignment board where he will base the assognment initially and to know who's the charge nurse, supervisor, RT assigned to his patients, the LVN to cover, etc.

I also showed him how to chart the hands-off report. Then how to print the med list and checked the meds in the med room if they're complete. If not we have to refill the meds from the Pharmacy.

After that we made rounds rounds to our assigned patients and did a quick ballpark assessment of the patients, checking the lines if still in place, GT/NGT/PEG tubes for patency, tracheostomy for placement and function, vent settings, foley catheters and other tubings, etc.

Then we prepared our medications to be given to the respective patients. Checking the residuals if the meds were given via PEG/NG/G tubes. Checking and changing the wound dressings per protocol. Hanging IV antibiotics and flushing IV pushes as ordered. Ensuring that CNA doing the care also checks the VS and the overall status of the patient.

After passing the meds, I taught him how to chart thoroughly based on his ballpark assessment and also do patient-family teachings as required. I also showed him how to chart and execute the nursing actions for Medicare billing.

At midnight we gave our due meds and due FSBS as ordered. Then we rechecked our previous documentation for accuracy. Sometimes we collect labs and samples and submit it to the laboratory for testing. And also making rounds every hour to check if the patients were still alive.

Then in the morning we do the oral care, suction the patient for any secretions, keeping the bedside clean. Changing the IV tubings and tube feedings. Checking the I&O's. Making sure that patients who were hemodialysis were made ready for the procedure. Pass the morning meds and wrap up the charting.

So my, the orientee was picking up slowly. At least he has the base knowledge of the bedside routines. He has still to complete 8 weeks of orientee until he is ready by himself. It still a long way for that but I'm sure he's doing ok.

Cancun Getaway

Amidst the Covid19 hoopla, me and my cousin decided to have a short vacay and had sneaked out from our busy schedule from the hospital. We flew to Cancun for a weekend getaway. The place was been devastated by two hurricanes the previous weeks and it showed from the uprooted trees on the streets. The place still stood from the adversity of mother nature. Business still has to go on.

We checked in at Canopy by Hilton at the main boulevard and the hotel was kinda uninhabited because of the scourge of Covid. Good for us, because we got to enjoy the hotel on our own without worrying for getting infected. The hotel staff meticulously disinfect every nooks and crannies of the building.

The first night, we book a 4 course dinner at Ritz Carlton Cancun, Fantino Restaurant. There were few customers and the restaurant was too spacious for us. We had a sumptuous and delightful dinner. We did enjoyed the ambiance and the superb services of the servers and waiters.

The second day we went to Tulum Beach. The place was so different compared to when I last came here. The bus ride was too long but we enjoyed the Tulum Beach. At least we were compensated for coming there and endured the gruelling bus ride. Hehehe. Tulum is more unexplored and the water ws pristinely turquoise and awfully warm. We like walking of the powdery white sand and basks of the cool breeze of the Caribbean Sea. The food was fresh and tasteful. Tulum has its own allure that we had to remember for sure.

The third day we went to Playa del Carmen and enjoyed the public beach. We rented and reclining chair and ate fresh seafoods with gusto. We also enjoyed watching cute and hunky guys passing by our side and mee some cool and friends gals. My cousin was really gregarious.

The fourth day we spent staying at the hotel and enjoyed the swimming pool at the rooftop. We also shopped at the nearbu Isla Mall and also walked to the public beach and checked out how it is. My cousin was a little under the weather. He got indigestion from eating too much raw seafoods.

Then in the afternoon, I flew back to Los Angeles with some majo setbacks. They told me that I was late and the plane had left me. I told them that I did not received any information that my flight was been changed. Good thing they found me another flight to fly straight to Los Angeles.

At least this vacation was been a good escape from our busy nursing life in Los Angeles and Long Beach respectively. I've been working with extra shifts since May and I am really burned out from too much work and overtime. Though they pay me good I'm still human and get tired.

I am glad I made this decision to unwind in Cancun, Mexico, enjoyed the beaches and foods and it had surely freshened me up. Hallelujah!!!!

A Good News Indeed

Today, I am happy because I've got a good news that all the pigs at the piggery were all disposed except for the five ones that were still small for their age. It seems that they just refused to get sold. Lol!

I started this venture with my cousin in June, June 26 to be exact with a nervous doubt that maybe it won't work out but I challenged myself to venture anyway despite of the rising African Swine Flu outbreak in China. At that time the Philippines is not affected yet. But if it happens to strike the Philippines I'm confident that the piggery farm will not be affected because it is a secured place and no other animals were allowed from outside.

My cousin convinced and encouraged me to invest at the piggery. She said instead of my money going somewhere at least it is being put to use and will eventually gain more. And at the same time it will accumulate as my savings because it's there in the Philippines and I cannot touch it. It is a dormant money.

After some thousand thinking... I kinda weigh in the benefits and after 4 short months my money grew to at least 27% from the principal. That was a hefty money. Where can I find that in 4 months. That's my savings anyway... I am glad I trusted my cousin to handle it.

I told her you can use my money without interest as long as you will return my capital. They just have to give me 50 thousand pesos out from what they profit and the rest of it will be theirs. That's a good deal. As long as my savings were intact I'm fine with it. At least I have helped them in some ways. Where else could they get that.

I was just lucky that my cousin know how to handle the business and that she is very understanding that the money that I send for them was hard earned from my extra days at work. She knows how difficult it is to send $400 every week to sustain the feeds of the fattiners. It almost consist 1/3 of my salary and I left with 3/4 of it. and I'm able to stretch the money for my daily needs and bills. That's a little sacrifice and it works.

Now I know how hard working she is and he husband to keep up with the affairs in the farm. Someday I can go home and live there to feel the joys in the farm which I missed so much. I am just lucky to have received this good news.

I'm an avid believer of the saying, "No pain, no gain." And this is so true with my cousin and family. I know how they determined they are to give me an impression that they really mean business. Yes, I am proud of them and I feel great!!!!!

Eating Out At Tesse

 "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach." This is the usual lines that I have heard to woe a guy. But for this blog, the one that I am trying to impress is the birthday boy, my cousin Val. 

Months ago, I planned to treat him for an outdoor dinner at Tesse Restaurant for his birthday, so I set the reservation on September 27, a day before his birthday. Tesse is located between Sundet Blvd. and La Cienega Blvd. A usual hub for weekend partygoers.

We met in front of the restaurant. The birthday boy wears a matching animal skin design on his top and  sliders. He looked trendy and elegant. I wore a white top with blue blossoms which looks like a porcelain on me layered with a gray checkered blazer. We both look dashing that night.

The restaurant was just simple but there were a lot of customers at the outdoor patio. Inside was exquisite. The dining area was posh and the big wine cellar on the west side was amazing. All in all Tesse was fabulous.

We ordered the burrata salad with figs and an array of pates and bread for appetizer. The burrata was soo good and the pate was just satisfactory. Then for the entrée Val ordered the lemon salmon and I ordered the Jidori chicken. Both entrée were sooo good. We also drank white wine from Oregon which was perfect with our entrée. When we finished the entrée Val was still hungry so I recommend to him to order the grilled branzino which he liked the most and was super perfect with the wine that we're drinking, so he ordered one more glass of the wine to pair up with the branzino. We were full after that. For the dessert we ordered the baked peach with light cream and whole pistachios. It was heaven....  we don't want to leave.

At least I made Val happy for his birthday. It was the best dinner we had together. Can't wait for another one for us to enjoy such sumptuous food like this. Despite paying enormously at least we've enjoyed the food that we ate and we have time to see each other and talk to each other despite of the pandemic.

Next dinner will be on my birthday at Bavel Restaurant in downtown LA. We already made reservations for it takes time to make it. Can't wait for it..... and I am very excited.

Cooking With The Light's Off

I came here without any idea on what to blog. I'm clueless of what to vent out here. I don't know what to do. My head is empty and I don't have any agenda for today.

Usually when I blog I always have a pattern and topic to follow. Everything is being planned out. At least I have an idea of what to write. But right now, I have nothing to write. What's wrong with me.

Aaah.... maybe I will  tell you what happened this morning. I was cooking breakfast. Shredded broiled chicken, split peas, ramen noodles, spinach, tomatoes, onions, and garlic.

I was cooking and in the middle of the process the lights were off. My stove is electric driven and my water heater was also electric. Both where on before the light was cut out while the microwave was heating the roasted chicken. And I was sautéing some tomatoes, onions, and garlic.

I tried the bedroom outlet but it was not working. The one that only working was at at the living room so I decided to transfer the stove there and finished cooking.

Once I'm done cooking, I took my breakfast and texted my landlord that I had a short circuit again and he texted me back that he will fix it when he comes back from work.

I went to sleep and woke up sweating. It was hot all day. I felt like a fried potato on my bed. It was hot when I woke up. I checked if the light's are off and to my dismay my landlord did not fix it yet.  It was a terrible day for me. Haist.                                                                  

On Rainy Days

I hate myself. I hate how compulsive I am. I hate my weakness to online shopping. I just hate my addiction on buying stuff from online. I hate this feeling.....

In as much as I want to save money, I kept buying things online. Every time I saw things on sale from my phone, there is no instance that I won't buy something. It's sale.... and real marked down extremely.

Lately, I've spend a lot for an original Penguin polo shirts. I mean these are authentic Penguin shirts, which I grew up as a child. Only sold for 17.99 a piece. I bought 5. There's also a sale for my favorite T-shirts made by Buck Mason, originally made in America, soft and silky shirts for only 15.00 a piece which is originally priced 60.00. And some summer shorts at J. Crew which was sold for 14.99 each. Haist.... compulsion galore!

I've been paying my Paypal account for 500.00 every 2 weeks just to maintain my balance below 1000 so as not to incur high interest rates. At this time I'm doing good in tapering the balance. Yay!

My focus right now is to lessen and then curtail this compulsion and addiction. It's hard to do "cold turkey" but I have to do it so that I can save enough money in my Savings Account. At least I controlled the money in my savings but the one I cannot control is the money that coming out fast because of my hobby... online shopping.

My house if full of boxes of all these stuff that I bought online which I felt unnecessary because I have enough stuff. I guess it's just for me to feel satisfied and fulfill my thought of buying discounted things which were of high quality and that I won't be buying them at the expensive marked price. The feeling that I bought them cheap is what satisfies me, but after that I regretted buying it because I am not using them.

Hopefully, this compulsion will go away and that my life will turn out normal with no problems at all. That's all I want right now. And to save money as well for the rainy days.

Last Day Of Orientation

Today is the last day of orientation for my third orientee. Her name is JQ. I had her for 7 weeks and I am confieent she can do it on her own pretty much.

I feel good that another RN was been released in the quagmire condition of nursing. She's be nervous at first but I believed she will do right. She just needs a little encouragement and less monitoring. As long as she asked if she's in doubt, she'll be fine. And I told her that, not to assume but ask if she doesn't know.

With our 7 weeks company, I can attest that she pretty much do everything from making hands off, assessing the patient, pass meds, do some procedures, collecting specimens, keep everything on hand, etc. I always told her to check residuals before touching the enteral tubes, no matter what she is doing and to assess the condition of the abdomen. I also told her to firstly, assess the respiration first, which is the first thing to do, check the vent settings, the saturations, the chest rise and falls, the breath sounds, suction patients frequently, etc.

I also enumerated to her to do spot checks from head-to-toe and assess ABCDEFG which stands for Airway, Breathing, Cardio, Disability, Exposure/Education, Further Information, Goals. That's the only key that I always used when assessing my patients ad I am happy to pass it on to her. Which she complied with much resolve.  Yay...

As I parted with her tonight, I gave her a little memento to take on her nursing journey, one stainless bandage scissor and one stainless hemostat for removing very tight male adapters form the PICC lines. I'm glad she took it!

I also told her that if ever she needs any answers to her questions in the future she can call or text me anytime. I needed to assure her that I am not leaving her on the sides with a guarantee that I am always available just in case she is in a very tight spot.

I wish JQ good luck and welcome to the chaotic world of nursing!

Planning An Inter-Covid19 Times Trip

It's been six months already that I've been working with extra shifts and lo and behold I have saved a lot of money. Now I felt that I needed some much needed vacay so I decided to book a vacation to Cancun and Mexico City since Mexico had opened any US citizens can visit the country.

It's been a long time that I have not traveled and so I took the risk this time despite that Covid19 is still on the rise. I guess this thing will not ot until a vaccine will be out to ate the virus. But at this time since there's no luck to stop it people doesn't care anymore on what they are doing. But for me, I am very bored and tired from working 12 hours-a-day for five days.

 I've been itching to travel since at this time of the year I always plan to go on a long trip to my favorite place in this globe... Europe. I am an avid Europhile so I always go their every year. But since it is Covid19 time, and Europe is close to any US citizens, I will opt to go to my neighboring country down south. I've been there several times and I just can't help coming back there. Me and my cousin will embark the first leg to Cancun, Mexico for my extended birthday celebration.

We will spend out Halloween and Dia de los Muertos there. We will explore Cancun, Playa del Carmen, and Tulum. We will bask on the colorful and sunny Carribean Beach of Islas Mujeres, Cozumel and Tulum. We will have a blast there and enjoy our trip to the fullest for this is our first trip during Covid19 times. For sure we will appear like freed animals from the picket fences. Hahaha.

And a week after that, I will fly again to Mexico City and spend 6 days there. Just winding everywhere and compensate for the lost time of traveling this year. Thank God that the country had opened many tourists for this Covid19 scare times.

Now that America is in chaos because of the forthcoming elections I guess it will take a while for peace to settle in. The opposing liberal party was the culprit for igniting this riots and anarchy just because they oppose and hate President Trump.

Ah well, I still pursue traveling despite of the scare. As long as I took precautions and stay away from crowded places. I will make sure I will enjoy this trips and will have a blissful blast.

The Reticent Dr. W

It seems that things at work was back to where it was. I felt relieved that Dr. W had forgiven me. Now I can handle his patients. I will be more careful this time when it comes to him. Thanks to Ate Shirley for talking to him and backing me up.

You just didn't know what I felt before when he got mad at me. I felt awful and it seems that I am no good at all. I mean this doctor can flick his fingers, like Thanus, and then all my credentials will be lost. But I don't think he is as villainous and mean he is as perceived by my other colleagues.

I mean every person has their soft part, so I guess Dr. W has one. If he has none then maybe he would not forgive me. I am just fortunate that he gave me another chance and that I will treasure and learn apart.

So far the people in the administration knows about what happened and initially they instructed the house supervisor to not assign me to his patients which they followed. I thought I will get suspended that time. But lo and behold they did not. Maybe they realized that they needed me because in reality the facility is short of staff. And that's the other reason that Ate Shirley had explained to Dr. W.

Whew.... I was just lucky enough that he is a forgiving guy despite of the mean outlook. I guess he also gauged each staff whether they can be trusted with his patients or not. And he always did it to me after the incident. Good thing I was kind of responsive at what he ordered and that they were done on time without any miss. I'm just probably making an impression to him so that I can earn his hard-to-get trust.

Now, I have to keep and treasure this trust and will not try to disappoint Dr. W again. So help me God!

Lesson Learned That Sticks

The previous nights I was busy with a Parkinson's patient who I think was dying. He's having severe desaturation down to the 60's to 50's and was just steady between 60s and 70s. His blood pressure was between 60s/50s-70/40s.

For the desaturation, the RT placed him on Hi-Flo at 50 liters 70% but still his saturation had plateaud at the high 60s. They even did the ABG but it was fine. I told the charge nurse and asked her to call the house doctor. The house doctor came and ordered to place the patient on BiPap at 16/5.

I also called the attending physician but he did not order anything because the patient is DNR. He told me to call the pulmonologist which I did not do because the house doctor was already ordering to give comfort to the patient.

For the low blood pressure the house doctor ordered a low dose dopamine drip but still the patient kept deteriorating with the saturation and BP going low. After two hours I saw the monitor at the station that the patient was in ventricular fibrillation. I went back to the room finding the patient dead, not breathing and no vital signs.

I call the primary doctor again and informed him about the death and he called back and acknowledge the call. He told me to call the family which I did. At first the POA does not answer so I left a message then after two calls I called the second person and lo and behold she answered and said that she will call all the family after I explained to her that the POA did not answer after 2 calls.

At around 3AM the pulmonologist made rounds and got mad at me because I did not call him. He also got mad at the other nurse who also had a just a patient died ahead of me. He told me that next time I need to call him for any changes in condition. I apologized to him which he did not answered.

After an hour the supervisor called me that the pulmonologist was mad and that he told her that from now old I will not be assigned in all of his patients. The supervisor made a report and forwarded it to the nursing director.

I went home so down that day fearing that I will lose my job. I prayed and prayed to God to help me out. I was off that day so I needed to unwind my worries. I went to the beach to just feel the air and vent out my emotions. I cried a lot.

I went home very scared but still I prayed because I trust the Lord for my future. When I came back the next day after my off the on-duty supervisor told me about the nursing director's decision which lifted my anxiety. I told her that I cannot sleep and was very worried.

When the pulmonologist came the following day she asked him if he can give me a second chance because he feels that I deserve a second chance because I really took care of my patients. The pulmonologist told her that he will give me a second chance and warned her to tell me to stay focus all the time.

Thank God, He answered all my prayers.

Random Thoughts For Last Month

The month of August had gone by so fast. Many things had happened and was surely recorded in the annals of history. All the memories will be gone and forgotten and some will be remembered. My personal life right now is extremely boring. Maybe because of the covid19 situation happening globally. People cannot go out and mingle. And mine was only between work and home and nothing else. As much as I wanted to wander or travel, I cannot even do it because of this covid19 scare. Even going to the grocery store was limited to an early morning eavesdropping and visit wherein there is less people shopping. That's the effect of the spread of covid19 nowadays.

Watching the TV nowadays was even scarier. A lot of protests and riots in some major cities and a lot of black people were shot by the police. I mean those people who really provoked the police to shoot and kill them. After George Floyd there is Jason Blake who was shot in Kenosha, WI lately. He was charging the police and even challenged them by walking towards the them on the street raising a knife with one hand. Hence, he got shot several times at the back.

Even the peaceful protest in Portland, OR was turned into a riot destroying private and public properties and a lot of unnecessary looting. Their stupid mayor was encouraging the rioters to rally and voice their opinions. How stupid! And it came to a point where the rioters went to his apartment and burned it, demanding him to resign. Hahaha.... Now, he showed up in one of the TV network and proclaimed that Trump caused the division of the nation. WTF!!!

*******

The DNC and RNC conventions were the latest talk of the town. As I watched TV it really irked me how bias the media were. It was really obvious that they wanted to overthrow the president and they really disgusts him that much. I guess Trump is the best candidate at this time compared to Biden who is not truthful and was kinda demented now, plus his party had encouraged this chaos happening around us right now.... the riots..... the looting.... the unnecessary burning of the federal buildings.... the toppling down of religious and iconic historical statues and busts....the media bashings.... the BLM and Antifa threats....etc. I admire the president for not being affected by all of this hate and still continued to make the country stable. I also heard the speech of the first lady during the RNC convention and oh my..... there were a lot of comments especially the left side saying that it was overrated. Whatever!!

******

I heard from my cousin in Batangas, Philippines that the pigs were thriving well with only some minor problems. One of the pig was mildly coughing and they started giving him antibiotics and isolated him from the herd. She said that they were growing as expected and teh weights were well maintained. That there is no major problems at this time. I am glad that this project was successful. Hopefully, it will be continued for another cycle or maybe for several cycles. At least people there has jobs to do especially taking care of the pigs rather than just asking money from me and do nothing.

*******

It seems that my work at Sharon Care Center seems toxic nowadays. The DON is not that supportive to the nurses anymore. One time, one of the night RN called off during the day shift and the AM and PM shift texted her and asked her of her decisions regarding the staffing. Can you imagine she did not respond? So the PM RN supervisor texted her that she cannot stay over because she will be working in the other job in the morning. When the PM RN Supervisor left, the building was left only with one licensed nurse which is an experienced LVN. Then at 1AM the licensed staff called 911 because one of the patient in Station A was critical and the MD ordered to transfer her to the hospital. Then the LVN texted the DON about what had happened, and she responded at 2AM. I mean how come she did not responded when the AM and PM nurse surpervisor texted her? She is the DON and was been paid 24/7. If there is any problem in the facility she has to respond right away because she is the DON. And now she threatened the previous RN Supervisor because she left the building with only one licensed nurse. That's bullshit!

******

My sister was another big headache. She got sick last month because she's not buying her medicines despite I send her money. My niece had told me that she looks like she's gaining weight also which aggravated her diabetic condition and now she is miserable because I don't send the money to her directly but through my niece where she had a spat with her because of this. I did that because of the fact that she's not buying her medicines and it's much better if my niece will buy her medicines and give it to her. In that I can be sure that she is taking and buying the medications. Now, I don't have any problems anymore for her buying unnecessary stuff and foods that made her gained weight and is not allowed for her disease condition. At least I know now what is happening to her because my niece is spotting check her and is my watchdog. Just trying to be clever here and I know it's not the best idea but at least it worked at this time.

Dreaming Of India

I wish I could travel right now. It seems that India is a nice pick. So I checked it out on Google and found out that it is indeed beautiful there. The culture is fascinating, the food appears delish, and the temples seems interesting to visit. Four places I have in mind to explore in India and that is New Delhi, Jaipur, Gwailor, and Agra.

New Delhi, because it is the capital and a typical base city where I can start getting on the train as I do a side trip or day trip in the coutryside. The bustling city is also culturally rich and can offer a lot of spectacular places for me to peruse, food to taste, people to meet, etc.

Jaipur, because of its good reputation in rug making and also being dubbed as 'The Pink City'. I was fascinated of the fortresses and temples in pink colors and I want to see it in person and be in awe of its beauty and splendor.

Gwailor, because it is famous for its sturdy and beautiful fortifications and is just a stone throw away from New Delhi. I can just hop on a train and be there in a jiffy. I am impressed of the tall fortifications on top of the plateau that I am itching to be there and just watch it with jaw open from a distance.

Agra, because of the world famous Taj Mahal. Ever since when I was a child it is my dream to see this beautiful edifice made for the love of a man to his most prized woman. Their romance was interesting and had amazed me because he even made her this almost perfect temple loved by many.

I want that dream to come true.... I want myself to see and feel the real place. Plus the myriad of yummy and intriguing foods and delicacies they have such a tandori, biryani, rich curries, buttery naan, crispy dosas, etc. Oh I can't wait to try everything and just feel their heavenly tastes. Aaaaahhh....

I Miss Traveling

Time flies so fast..... August is almost ending and September soon will usher in. I miss traveling in Europe a lot. I always travel every start of Fall Season and apparently this year I cannot travel because of the Covid19 travel advisory. It really sucks but I cannot do about it because there were a lot of scary stories about Covid19 and I don't want to come across with it. I lost a very dear friend from Covid19 and until now the hurt that I felt when she died still lingers like a cut on my skin, it hurts deep. I miss her so much. So for this year, on my birthday in October me and my cousin Val was planning to have a road trip to Monument Valley. I have to make some arrangement early on so that we will enjoy it. I have to book the hotels and see or check what things to do in Utah. Browsing Google.com and checking about Monument Vally gave me some chills and thrills and I cnnot wait till it happens. I am so excited and same as Val. He has a lot of plans as well and suggested a lot of things to do. For sure he did his own research. I was surprise...... I guess local road trips is the new alternative to suffice my love of travel especially in Europe. The change of environment alone will try to divert our minds from the busy environment at work and the community. For sure we will be having fun, God willing. I've been working almost everyday to save up for the upcoming travels but it seems that things had gone haywire recently because of Covid19. The question is, "When will this pandemic ends?" The answer remains unseen since there is no vaccine out in the market yet. I guess it will be a long long time to have this pandemic stopped. Plus the upcoming election is another factor I am considering not traveling. I want to be home when election comes so that I can see and know who will win. Hehehe.... hmm, can't wait for that to happen though.

Pig Project

Today, I woke up quite relieved as if it's just the usual day. I'm preparing myself to go to work. It's my second day overtime and I'm just quite okay with no fatigue or tensions felt. It's just a typical day for me. Tomorrow I will be off but as usual I will work at my other job for more paperworks to finish for eight hours. It's a good day off with pay. Hehehe... Since it's still Covid times, I cannot travel so I decided to work everyday with some overtime in between just to save up when the travel ban reopens. At least I have a hefty savings right now, enough for me to save for the rainy days. Some of my money went to the 'pig project' in the Philippines. I almost spend ten thousand dollars for that project. The pigs will be sold in October. Let's see if this project works then I will invest more of my money for the project. This is just the trial period. It's quite hard to save money every week for the pig's feeds and send it to my cousin in the Philippines who handled this project. At least I have to come up more than four hundred dollars each week for the feeds for four months. It seems that Katherine can be quite trusted for this. She's the one who come up with the idea about the project. She offered me the project first because the pig pen that my uncle was using before was empty so she messaged me and laid out the portfolio. I thought about it a million times and I realized that if I tried it, nothing will be lose from me anyway. I already dipped myself in hot water now so I have to man up this decision and just go with the flow. It's a very hard responsibility but I have to do it, period. We'll see what happens..... and I'll keep you updated.

Partly To Be Blamed

I cannot quite contain myself right now with the sad news I had received yesterday. I am still in denial and shock as well. I felt that the burden was on me because I was the one who is collecting the money for the operation and I gave it to Nancy quite late. I don't know.... but I am feeling it that way. I am more of a worrier so they say. Nancy was always thankful at all times.... because I helped her despite that I never knew her and her husband. She always tells me that I am a good person and that she was very very appreciative of everything that I have done for them. She never complained at all. She was all grateful for me initiating a fund campaign for Jojit's AV shunt operation. I felt also that the time was not on our side. It seems that it was already written in the skies to happen. That Jojit's life's thread was at the near end and that there's no hope anymore. Just like fate I may say....... Time immemorial, I will always remember this fiasco. Haist.. I felt so bad. I felt that Jojit's life was on my hand and I blew it. Partially, I guess that had happened. I don't know.... Life is full of surprises. We don't know what God has in store for us.... Our life is always at the mercy of our God. At least the only thing that I am grateful with is that I have initiated the fund campaign and gave hope to the couple (Jojit & Nancy). I am also thankful that I have known how drawn I am to such hapless situation and had empathized myself for it. It gave me a realization of myself that I am not aware of and that I know now how to handle it have I encountered another situation in the future.

Received A Sad News Today

I felt so sad today because I heard a surprising news from Nancy that Jojit had passed away today. I felt like crying inside when I read her message to me. I didn't feel that warm tears had rolled slowly down my numbed cheeks. I felt that all my efforts to collect money to help for his operation was in vain. I felt so guilty that my campaign was not that successful and had not even helped Jojit have his operation. He didn't even waited for his scheduled operation for this coming Thursday. He had a cardiac arrest today and per Nancy he had a flatline for seven times and they even defibrillated him three times but he passed away eventually. The hair from the back of my neck stood up upon hearing the horrible situation. I was in shock. My hunch was that his body gave way from too must waste that had accumulated for having no dialysis for 5 days. The high levels of potassium and ammonia in his system triggered the cardiac arrest and his fragile body cannot bear the accumulated waste products complications. Having no functioning AV shunt, made him without an access for dialysis thereby cleaning up his body for all that toxic body wastes that had accumulated for days was literally not possible. Plus he was really weak to tolerate the procedure. Nancy had told me that when Jojit was even conscious, he was telling her reminding not to forget to thank all those people who had helped them for this unprecendented ordeal. It was so touching reading it from Nancy's messages. I was crying hard. A day before, I had send Nancy all the money that I collected for the operation and she was very hopeful that it will make Jojit live but all of the sudden I heard this very sad news. Imagine my surprise when I've heard it. Well, I cannot question God's plan for him, so I trusted Him for making the best for Jojit and his family. I told Nancy to be strong and think that Jojit is in a pain free and peaceful place now with our Creator. I'm glad I am a part of their life now. And this made me grow more as a caring person and made me aware of my differences and my capabilities. I am amazed of myself sometimes and this made me realized that I can do immeasureable things which is even mind blowing to me.

Emphatic Benevolence

I got a messenger message the previous day from one of my friends in Facebook. She is familiar to me but not that really close. Let's just say she's a random stranger. The only connection is that she is one of my Facebook friends. She messaged me, sounding helpless, asking me to help her regarding her husband's plight. Her husband is a dialysis patient and had his AV shunt clogged at this time. He was not being dialysed right now because of the clogged shunt. So she asked me to help her financially for the operation of another AV shunt. She doesn't know what to do because she has nothing on hand right now... I mean she is financially hard-up. She was invoking me to help her. I felt some reckoning shivers in my spine and all of a sudden felt pity at her condition. I know the feeling of being helpless and alone having the big weight on her shoulder. I know the feeling of maintaining a family on dialysis because my dad has one before and I am the only one who had supported him financially. And for this poor woman trying to make their ends meet, I can feel what and how she felt at that time. I felt an instant sympathy to her inadvertent situation because her pleading message was about to burst immensely in my heart. It was a strange-iffy-feeling of pity and emptiness inside me. I felt so enormously numbed. I never thought that it was a scam because she felt sincere in her message. Despite some warnings to me that it's a scam, I still believed that she is truthful in her pleadings. I closed my eyes and asked guidance from the Lord and then I immediately put up a posting in my timeline asking close friends, relatives, cousins, aunts, uncles, classmates, acquaintances, etc. to help me in my campaign to aid this guy to have a new AV shunt access. Putting up a little money from spare money change just for his operation so that he can be dialysed right away. I was surprised of the sudden outpouring of donations and I am extremely happy that now I can help them have a new AV shunt access for this poor guy suffering a lot from the complications of having a dialysis access. I thanked all those who have supported me in my campaign and for helping this family in anyway to ease up just a bit of their financial suffering and to at least gave them more time for this sick guy to spend more time with his love ones. TO ALL WHO HAVE HELPED..... THANK YOU THANK YOU SO MUCH...... AND MAY GOD BLESS YOUR BENEVOLENT HEARTS. "In whatsoever you do, in words or in deeds, do all in the name of Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him." - Colossians 3:17

Searching For Roots

Reaching for roots is not an easy thing especially if that person concerned has a lot of ill feelings. I am writing right now because the previous day I was reading Shaun's blogs and I wonder where he's at now. So I tried hunting him in the internet and luckily I found him. Not only him but his little bro and sis, too. His mom was my close cousin. When I went to America I stayed at their house in Katy. Literally, they knew me because they saw me physically at their house when I came to visit their mom. When I passed my NCLEX, I moved to McAllen, TX and then after few years went to California to work as a traveling nurse and then decided to stay in Los Angeles. Shaun was in high school when I left Texas and when he went to college I heard he graduated with high honors. It's been a long time that I haven't heard from my cousin Perlina and when I got in touch with Kuya Ernest, he told me that Ate Perlina had a divorce and the kids were out for college and had lived separately as well. I was in constant contact with Shaun after he graduated college and until he moved to Taiwan to study. I've read his inspirational blogs when he was there and then all of a sudden he was inactive and I have not had any communication with him. His mom, my cousin Ate Perlina went back to the Philippines and had lived there for a few years then went back to America to live with Shaun. In my search I saw that Shaun was living now in Marlborough, MA. My hunch was he probably is teaching at MIT because I've heard he has a masteral and doctorate degree in engineering. He is academically inclined like me, hehehe. Then in my search I saw that his little bro Joshua was living here in Long Beach, CA which is a few stones from me. I was really amazed. I told my other cousin Kuya Ernest about the kids and he told me that Joshua is not also communicating with them and same with Shaun and Mira. He said that Joshua is somewhere in California and is married already. He also knew that Shaun is in Massachussettes and he also said the Ate Perlina is living with him. On the otherhand, he doesn't know where Mira is. All he knows is that she is also married and had stayed in Texas. I told him that in my search I saw that Mira is living at the present in Austin. Yes, it was a long gone struggle to search for my little nephews and niece. But I am happy that I've located them. I am always liking Shaun because he's smart and he's familiar with me. He was a shy kid before but he is okay. Maybe in the future I can send him a card and asking how he is. It is indeed true that blood thicker than water.

Fleeting Night

The night seems like it's eerily fleeting. So much happened and it's almost the end of the shift. My orientee was kinda bored because we only have 3 patients. I'm also bored as well because I have nothing to do except for covering my LVN for the IV meds. It was surprising that I don't feel sleepy tonight. I thought I will be... considering that I have not slept yesterday afternoon because of doing binge-watching Korean telenovelas. I was just laying on my bed yesterday watching the movies. I got up at 1630 to get myself ready for work. I felt fine despite of lack of sleep. And tonight, it feels like a breeze. Every moment was just smooth after midnight. It was dead after that. At 0500 the unit went live again because the nurses were doing some patient care at the bedside, keeping theirselves busy to wrap up the shift. Quite quick but kinda intimidating..... because you don't know what happens next. I mean these patients were critically ill and anytime soon some will deteriorate and get coded. Anything is imminent and unpredictable. Some patient's were kinda fussy and demanding, some just wanted to sleep, and some have no idea what is happening because they were nonresponsive. A lot of patient types and we don't know who will crash. The night was totally and immensefully fleeting. So far nothing major had happened. Good thing we had survived it but there's still few more hours before the shift ends and still we don't know, something might happen anytime. Hopefully not.....

My Fave Movie 'Coffee Prince'

Every time I watched a Korean telenovela, I feel so excited. Right now I'm in a marathon of watching an old series 'Coffee Prince'. My.... I was hooked to the plot and the characters were so lovable especially the main cast Eun Chan and Han Gyul. Haist I cannot wait for the next episode. After I worked last Sunday, I went home at midnight. I cannot sleep that time so I opened my Viki app and browsed for some movies. Then I came across 'Coffee Prince' then I watched the trailer and was immediately fell in love. It's a hit-and-miss drama full of hate-and-love tandems but it is very addictive. I am in awe of the characters and I fell in love with the handsome Han Gyul. Despite it was shoot in 2012 the movie looks present except for the phones they're using. I miss my old Nokia phones. Hahaha.... I watched the series parts because I go to work and then when I get home I continue the episodes where I left off. I'm almost finishing up the 17 episode series and as I continue watching the story becomes intense. Haist. By the time I finished it, I guarantee that I'll be more in love with the characters. They are all adorable. I wish there will be Series 2 but it seems that there is not. It's almost eight years now since its inception and there were no follow-up series yet.... but at least I am satisfied with the first series anyway. I love everything in it! This movie will me my third all-time Korean drama movie favorite compared to my all time fave 'Moon Embracing the Sun' and 'Gu Family Book' now changed to 'Kangchi, the Beginning'.

Where Teaching Molds A New Breed

Haven't had a great night lately. Last night was great though. Me and my orientee had only 3 patients. We were assigned in the Center Wing. At first we had a rough start because we have to pick-up the patient that had just been coded but eventually was ordered to be transferred to ICU care. Instead, we got another stable patient from ICU after they had swapped them. Then after that everything was been smooth. I always told my orientee, that at the beginning of the shift it will be chaos then as the shift goes on everything will be smooth. And I think she already get the hang of it. Honestly, in my observation she was more attentive now with her meds and already anticipated what she needs. I still have to coach her sometimes to start this and do that. I guess, she always wanted me to cue her on what to do next. I always told her to make sure she is certain on what to go next and that she has to inform me if she has any unanswered querries. Still, she has to learn more procedures and patient care. I always told her to always tidy the bedside and always make the patients comfortable. Dirty bedside and surroundings makes the patient uncomfortable. At least, she is learning everyday. I am glad she is absorbing whatever I've taught her.

Back For More

T'was a fleeting day off I've had. I didn't do that much but just sleep the whole day. I really succumb to fatigue from working 2-days straight. It was really an off day spent just for sleep. When I woke up in the morning I felt refreshed and then in the afternoon I couldn't sleep anymore. I am worried that I will fall asleep at work tonight. It's already 0430 right now but I'm wide awake. I feel so hyper and energetic. I have more time orienting my orientee tonight. We had changed the patients, repositioned them, change GT dressing, start an IV, changed PICC line dressing, etc. We were loaded tonight. I am happy that I am able to teach Jennifer some important stuff and that she was quite fast now. She's really a fast learner. Thank God I didn't have a hard time training her. The night is still early though. But thankfully we didn't have any events happened. Cross my fingers, it will be a smooth night.

Blistering Night

Yeah, I have those nights that I am suppose to precept a new registered nurse orientee. And it was a lot of work. Imagine yourself going to the basics and your work clock went into a slow pace. It's blistering isn't it? I have the preceptee for three days and so far she is more dependable. She picks up easily and ask questions when she needs to. Her assessments were quite impeccable but still needs just a little bit of thoroughness. But I mean, she's already there. I guess I have trained her real fast. I only hav eher for 2 weeks but she's already been doing a lot. Her med pass was quite slow but she is at a good start. I told her to be slow but sure rather than making med errors. I showed her some hints in passing like how to crush crushable meds, how to manage her time, how to cluster care without altering the patients sleep, how to make and follow-up orders, how to do a make believe admissions in a training session (we have no chance yet to do admissions, but oh well believe me we will), ho wto call the house MD, how to call primary MD or consults for any changes in condition, how to chart for restraints and resplenishing the order, how to do chart checks, how to check for cardiac strips or rhythm if telemetry is ordered, toured her around the facility, did the scavenger hunt in the purchasing office, how to check the patency of enteral tubes, hang the new feeding bag and tubing, how to draw ordered iStat labs, and many more things she needed to learn before she can be on her own. I mean I already trained two new RN orientees so far and their fairing well on their own. Danni was seen more confident and I have heard about Aron doing an excellent job for admission. I have not seen Aron yet becaus ehe works per diem but I knew exactly from the start that he is a smart nurse. Going back to my busy night..... oh well one of my patient is a little anxious and was trying to decannulate himself, but I doubt it if he can do it becaus ehe appears very weak. I just gave him some IVP pain medication and he will go back to sleep. He is kinda feisty at times as well. Well..... so much hoopla for my blistering night... it's almost over and I'm close to the finish line. I am glad that I have survived or shall I say we had survived. It was one of those night that had many challenges but we solved it. T'was a night full of learning process indeed!

Can't Travel Because Of Covid19

Saturday was quite slow for me and I have to work extra shift (second day) today.

I got home this morning from work feeling so tired and fatigued. My shift last night was just crappy because I was so madly busy and it was my first night back (and I am doing an extra shift). Since the emergence of the Covid19 that had devastated the whole world and had affected the traveling industry, I took advantage of the moment working extra shift since I have nothing to do at the apartment.

At least I can save an extra more money for my next planned trip. Per my mom, "You have to prudently save for the rainy seasons." I felt that I am just lucky enough to have a job right now. Other people were just struggling enough finding their ends meet and it's so heartbreaking to see how they succumb to the mental, financial, and health devastation and anguish intentionally caused by this very virulent virus.

If Covid19 did not existed, I should be traveling by now. The world got shocked how fast it spreads from Wuhan, China to every remote parts of the world. Every country had been faced with some major issues on how to curtail or abate the spread of the virus. And the most hit country was USA because people here were just too stubborn to heed the recommendations and stipulations of WHO and CDC. The inevitable widespread public distrust with the government had severely affecting the progress on the fight against Covid19, hence all aspects of people's lives was severely affected.

Now that America had topped the list of all the countries hit by the virus, a lot of countries had banned travelers from USA to set foot on their respective soils. What a shame for the Americans and what a pity for those who abided the law and for those who wants to travel abroad to escape the wrath of the most reviled pandemic of the century.

Now that the economy was low, unemployment was rapidly surging up, and of course people were angry at the government on how it handled the entire health issues, it is very difficult what to do as people were scrambling on how to approach this pandemic.

As an experienced nurse, I am also worried about possible major spread, even to the remotest places of the world. And as a traveler, I am also upset because a permanent ban of US travelers were globally imposed because of the high turnouts of positive infections in the whole country. Such a failure indeed to the leaders handling this issue!

In my honest opinion at this time, it is really unsafe to travel nowadays because of the presence of the virus everywhere. It is much better to stay at home for quite a while not until the curve will be totally flattened. I myself is scared to start traveling because of the sudden rise of the Covid19 cases in the US especially here in Los Angeles where I live. Despite how I am itching to go to another place right now I guess it is not advisable to do so at this time.

I have prudently canceled two of my travel flights lately to Switzerland and Korea. I really did not cancel it but had changed it into a voucher credit so that I can use it again on my next travel plans because if I cancel it permanently the airline will deduct 30% from the original price whereas if I convert it into vouchers they will only fine me $35.00 plus they will give me a year to reconvert it into another flight, which to me is more reasonable and practical.

I hope this pandemic will be over soon so that the travel industry will be fully operational and that my travel plans will be on the move again. Oh how I can travel normally again but despite it will come back anytime soon I guess traveling will not be the same again.

People will be more extra cautious as they travel and in severe cases will be more obsessive and paranoid of what things are happening in the society and community. It's just an irony that we could not really stipulate some regulations in the US because people were just literally naïve of the severity of the Covid19 cases that were happening in front of their eyes.

People were just insensitive enough of others who were being vulnerable for this virus, or they were just selfish enough not to cooperate with the authorities because to them they are an autonomous human being where they had forgotten that they're not just the only one living around. Shame to them whose selfish ideologies had put the USA in the limelight in the middle of the Covid19 pandemic for being the worse country hit by the virus. And this will be written down in the annals of history, believe me.

A Day In The Laundromat

I was pissed off with my landlord because the washing machine and dryer were broken and not working. I asked him what happened through the text message (because I could not talk to him in person due to social distancing protocol) and he only replied they were broken.

I have bunch of dirty clothes to launder today, because I had piled up my working scrubs so that I can wash them all at once to save coins and of course detergent powder.

But today is my doom unfortunately because both machines were not working and my landlord had failed to inform me in advance that they were broken to the hilt. I have to go out and wash them at the laundromat near where I live.

I woke up at 0600H, to get ready so that I can arrive at the place early before it gets crowded. I got there with just few people doing their laundry. It was cool because the wash needs to be paid and the dryer is free. I like this place because the cleaning lady always sanitized the tables and the machines. It was a pretty nice and clean place and very well maintained as I observed.

I did my laundry for two hours and I had to fold them and tuck them real good in the bags. It was an enjoyable stay at the laundromat and I had a blast. I might probably do it again. I have not done this for quite a while and I am just thrilled to have done it again.

It was an enjoyable laundry-ing. At least I got to do it without getting embarrassed. But still my landlord should have cautioned me that the machines were broken. He knows that I always have to wash my working scrubs every two weeks but he just doesn't care. He doesn't even realized that his house is rotting. Haist.

The laundromat was huge with a lot of machines around. The people comes and goes but the vivacity of the place was very enticing. Plus it was well maintained and the staff were very attentive to their client's needs. No wonder people here just comes and goes. By the time I left the place the parking lot was full and the place got pack all of a sudden despite of the community looming issues about Covid19.

Hopefully my landlord can have the washing machine and dryer repaired or better yet buy a new one....just a suggestion. Lol!

Thankfully God will provide and all will be back to normal. This Covid19 had greatly affected my live and the lives of many people as well around the world. And it is just pitiful to see how few people had reacted and resisted to it as shown in the TV news and social media outlets.

At least I have my dirty clothes washed and I did my chores today. I am now free of dirty clothes and will do it again in two weeks. What a great day at the laundromat. Thank God!

My Last Night For This Week At Work

Tonight is my third night and it means I have to be off tomorrow. I gave up one patient from my assignment last night because he was converted into ICU status. So that leaves me eight patients but still they were heavy. 35B was converted into ICU status because of unstable heart rate and blood pressure. I got Alicia as my LVN and Troyae as my CNA. Troyae is pretty brand new so I have to help her a lot.

Initially, I got really busy because of a lot of new orders and abnormal labs. I see to it that every labs were reported by the AM shift and that the orders were been carried out. Then after I passed all the IV meds and did my assessments and nursing actions everything had slowed down drastically.

I have to give blood transfusion though on 34A because of hemoglobin level of 7.0. The first unit was given by the AM shift and I have to give the second unit. His vital signs especially the blood pressure fluctuates a lot. Sometimes systolic goes down to low 90s and sometimes stayed at above 100s. Very finicky BP. He is tachycardic though ranging for above 100s to low 120s. I have to focus on him more.

Again I felt so tired despite that I slept a lot today plus I took some Tylenol PO before I left the apartment to alleviate my body aches and soreness. It made some relief initially then my fatigue sets in after 2300 and I was yawning a lot which I really cannot stop so I decided to go to my car and took a 30-minute nap which had helped tremendously to keep me going for the rest of the night.

After my nap, I helped Troyae changed and bathed the patients then Alicia took over after she went back form break. It was tiring but I have to keep going. Three more hours then my shift will be over. Can't wait to have it happen. II just finished checking my nursing actions again checking for any due interventions to be signed, observe, done, and signed. Then I went on my second break.

At 0600, I will wrap up my charting, nursing actions, MAR, and I&Os. Then I'll be off. Yay!

My off is not really that an off because I will be working as an RN Supervisor at Sharon Care. I mean it is just an easy job, mostly paper works, hang IV's and controlled issues on the sides. Will do some paper works, hang IV antibiotics, care planning, do admissions, etc. I'll start at 1500 and finish at 2330. It is an 8-hour shift, very short compared to Kindred.

I've been doing this in quite a while (3-4 months or so) and so far my body is not exhausted. I made sure that I'm well rested everyday. But sometimes I felt fatigue so I have to take some anti-inflammatory agents to relieve me of some discomforts.

Doing like this quite a while had helped me saved a lot of money for future endeavors. I mean I had save a lot of money and I am very happy. I mean, I cannot travel these days because of Covid19 so I have to work extra to save money for my future travels. I already put up some business in the Philippines because of this money. And I am ecstatic about that as well. I only ask God for guidance and blessing to make it successful and prosperous. I couldn't complain more if that will happen. Love you Lord!

Under The Weather

I woke up feeling tired today. As if my back was so heavy and tense. I went to sleep early at 0930 and then woke up early as well at 0145. I just laid down on my bed and cannot sleep anymore. I tried to calm myself with soft music from YouTube and had put a cover on my eyes still I cannot go back to sleep. So I just stayed on bed and browse my Facebook.

I also felt like I'm feeling sick today but it is too late to call off so I brace myself to get at least an hour or half-an-hour sleep or rest. At 1640, I went to take a warm shower and then I felt good after that but still my body felt weak and tired. I didn't have any appetite at all. I decided to pass by KFC today so maybe I just munch something later on before at the parking lot.

I left the house at 1720, and the streets was kind of pack. There was a slight traffic along Western Avenue and then when I exited towards I-10 Freeway, the traffic was still the same on this Tuesday afternoon. When I exited towards La Brea Avenue still the traffic was the same and when I climbed the hills at Ladera Heights towards Slauson Avenue then the traffic was kind of waned a little bit. I still got early at the hospital parking lot at 1810. I was kinda hungry so I ate the little chicken sandwich and the chicken tenders that I bought at KFC.

At 1851, I went in the hospital to clock-in after the guard took my temperature. I'm still feeling tired but I'm here already so I have to make the best of it. I might try taking Tylenol later to ease the soreness and generalized aches that I felt. Maybe I overslept today and the aches was from too much lying down on the bed. Hahaha.

After the huddle, I reported at Center Wing to check the board for my assignment. Today I still have to keep 30A, 31A, 32B, 33AB, 34A, 35A, and they added 35B and 36B for me, making my assignment 9. My LVN is John and my CNA is Sulfise. It's a good team anyway. I gather all my data and then started to chart for my hand-offs and then checked the due meds that I needed to administer.

At 2030, the charge nurse told me that 30A will be transferred to 12B so I need to give report to the nurse in West Wing in charge of 12B which is Kim. I passed my IV meds first then went to West Wing to give report to Kim. Then after 30 minutes ICU transferred another patient to Room 30, which was just vacated by the previous patient. I called ICU and spoke to Are Gennie to get the report of the patient that was just transferred.

All nine patients were so heavy and I have to focus on the two patients that were hypotensive, one is bradycardic and the other one is tachycardic. The tachycardic one had a dialysis tonight and it has to be stopped because he became hypotensive gradually. The dialysis nurse has to give him some NS bolus until his systolic had reached above 90s. The bradycardic ones has also hypotension plus he is hypothermic so I have to turn on the warming machine and put the warming blanket on him.

After cleaning all the patient with the help of the CNA, I finally got my ass on the chair. Vital signs were been ok except those two that I mentioned earlier. Despite of being under the weather I am still here doing a pretty decent job. I can't believe my shift is almost over.

First Day But Felt Worn Out

Came initially at work, feeling groggy because of lack of sleep. I was off yesterday. I was mainly asleep the whole day and most of the night then this morning I cannot sleep anymore. I was mainly up the whole day and can't sleep anymore and by the time I'm going to work I felt beaten. Haist.

I left the house early at 1810 and arrived at work at 1830. I still have time to rest at the parking lot. I passed by at El Pollo Loco earlier to buy something to eat because I didn't even eat lunch plus also some tacos for my break later at work. At the parking lot I munch some taco chips and guacamole, then chased it with diet coke then enjoyed the churros for dessert.

Then at 1851 I went in the hospital to clock in and attend the huddle. At the huddle we talked about the usual topic like the recent Candida Auris outbreak we have and the importance of repositioning every two hours. Then we heard a rapid response call in Room 34B, then the huddle was off.

After the huddle I headed to the Center Wing where I was assigned and initially on the board I was assigned at 31A, 32B, 33AB, 34AB (34B was just coded), and 35A. Then an hour after I got the report they changed my assignment because 34B was made into a satellite ICU. So I have to pick-up 30A, which is an ex-Covid19 patient who just came yesterday. His Covid19 test here was just done today but he was already Covid19 negative in the previous hospital where he came from. But still he is an ex-Covid19 patient so I won't gamble.

Damn.... this is what I mean happens during my first day. I don't know how unpredictable were my assignments are. I don't know how and what to expect actually. Things changes in any opportune time. It sucks sometimes but what can I do. A job is a job. Things just sucks lately.

I checked out all my patients, made my little notes, passed my IV meds, made sure everything is in place. I thoroughly made my assessments, signed my meds in the MAR, then did the nursing actions for billing and checked all my IV's were patent and working. I also checked the vital signs that my CNA had taken and checked for any abnormalities and artifacts, assisted the CNA for anything, checked the GT residuals if the patients had tolerated their feedings, checked the oxygen concentrations whether trached or room air, etc.

I was assigned to turn at midnight with Ken and found that there was a tear on the G-tube of the patient in 30A so I reinserted a new one and it was successful. I carefully checked the placement and the residuals and checked the belly for any protrusion or swelling and the patient for any intolerance and breathing problems. So far there is none. Thank God!

I took my break at 0145 but I did have any appetite to eat so I went to my car to have a 30-minute nap then after that I just get a cup of coffee and sipped it at the station just to warm and fill my stomach.

As the night had deepened it feels so cold inside the hospital and I feel real cold so I put on my hoodies but still felt really cold so I got another coffee to warm me up. Fortunately, the coffee did some miracle. It warmed me up a little bit and at the same time had made me very hyper vigilant. Hahaha. Then the night continue on form there.

It's just 0313 at this moment of the blog and the night is still young. Four more hours and my shift will be over soon. So far, it is well managed and uneventful. Knock on the wood..... nothing major will happen. Crossing my fingers and toes here.

Jack Sans Jill On All Seasons

"Jack sans Jill went up the hill,
to drop a pail of water.
Jack fell down and broke his bike;
and nobody went with him after...
Lalala...lalalala.... 3x"

An apt song for a daily or so situation I always saw when I go to work every afternoon. And here's how the story goes....

Every time I go to work at Kindred LA in Ladera Heights, I always saw this amiable guy along La Brea Avenue climbing up a quarter of a mile street going up to Stoker Avenue along La Brea Avenue, pushing his black bike with a red pail sitting at the back seat of the bike. I saw him on all four seasons (Winter, Spring, Summer, and Fall) with the same situation slowly easing and climbing up the hill.

On Winter time, I saw him still in the dark with his black puffy jacket and gradually pushing up his bike with the red pail. I don't know what's in the pail but I am presuming that it pertains to his job or business. He painstakingly pushed his bike going up the steep hill huffing and puffing on the cold winter afternoon or night.

On Spring time, the same scenario is seen with his black puffy jacket on and black bonnet with the Spring flowers already sprouting and the trees with blooming flowers. Still this guy does not deter in pushing his black bike. His skinny physique was a pitiful site but still here's a man that is honorably making ends met despite of the chilly weather as he struggled mobilizing his goods to his delivery destination not minding the painful rewards of climbing the cruel steep hills of Ladera Heights starting from Slauson Avenue up to Stoker Avenue.

On Summer time, I can see him with his shirt's off, hiking the hill during the hot summer day with his sweat trickling down his face and his biceps were swelling while pushing his goods and his tight abs were really showing off proudly maybe due to the heavy load he was pushing up the hill. Having done this act for a tad long time, as what I've seen him all the time, his defined muscles was been emphasized more on his tall skinny physique. He was really a hardworking guy.

On the Fall season, he was still pushing his bike while the colors of the trees had changed. This guy still painstakingly and persistently do his usual thing with more dedication and perseverance. He inspired me a lot since the first day I saw him and I am planning to talk to him one day and interview him. Hopefully, I can talk to him in the future.

But as I drove along everyday, this man and his hapless sight when he climbed up the hill had greatly stirred my human feelings and senses and had inspired me to be strong willed just like this man. He is not embarrassed in what he does and he is more determined to deliver his goods all the time. I wonder what he really does, hence, I planned to chat with him one of these days.

The song "Jack and Jill" had inspired me as well but in this situation it's without Jill. (Please see the intro verses.) The steep hills of Ladera Heights that he climbed, his amiable persona takes Jack, and the huge red pail on the bike seat which he was pushing uphill and the black bike that he painstakingly been pushing were all described in the intro verse.

I am in awe of my literary creativity here but it all suits well on this inspiring guy. Hehehe.

Confusion In A Limbo

One hour after I got the report, had made my rounds, and did some of my assessments on my assigned patients, the supervisor had made some new revisions of the assignment on the assignment board. I was really upset and furious because she made a mess of my assignment just to accommodate one of the RN not to take the ICU patient that will be moved out from ICU going to room 35B.

They should have made that earlier, before we started the shift. It was just too upsetting for me to know that she favors the other RN. Haist... I was already very confuse because of so much things to do for my assignments and at the same time I already started working on them. Not dilly-dallying here, Ok. Now I have to re-adjust my assignment again just to cater for the favoritism issue of this supervisor. They always pick on me because I am a person who doesn't talk and complain so much. But today, I lost my cool and they tasted my wrath. Hahaha.

I just had a minor spat with the house supervisor telling her that my assignment's acuity was very very high and that she should have considered it before she changed the assignment. I explained to her that I have to start an IV for a recently amputated patient who is agitated and restless and had pulled out his midline IV access, that I have to cater for the needs of a super alert quadriplegic patient who always clucks his mouth continually when calling us for help because he cannot move and press the call light, that I have to look for a very evasive sling (I cannot find anything in the whole building) for a very demanding elderly guy who had dislocated (I don't have an idea how he incurred it) his right shoulder, that I have to fix the wound vacuum of the patient with a large nasty crater on his sacral area, that I have to change the PICC line dressing of an alert trached woman who always asked for her PRN Ativan IV push on time and never missed it, and of course that I have to start the second unit blood transfusion of the patient that was transferred from ICU who has a very low BP, has super low HR, and a super super low body temperature. Waaaah..... why me!!!

My long night was really really super busy but I have to believe in myself that I can do it..... that I can survived it..... that I have the power in my hands to finish everything until 7AM tomorrow. Despite of my furious emotions and angry feelings I have to seriously go on my path in order to get over this shift. Anyway, I will be off tomorrow. Finally yay!!!!! And what a night to end my weeklong work. Haist....

Well, I got confuse initially because of the drastic change of assignment by the house supervisor yet I managed to do it valiantly and miraculously. My super relax attitude and my quick witted thinking had finally bore some fruits... which per se a fruit of labor.... a coup de grace. Now I have time to make and write my blogs and had a real solo time to review my patient's new orders, lab reports, and check out some of the MD's progress notes.

I had a smooth sailing night despite of some tiny confusion in the beginning of the shift. Good thing that my calm approach to the situation and not panicked about it was just enough to tackle the problem. All my patients were finally comfortable and sleeping well. Thank God the shift is almost over. Ole! Ole!

Random Thoughts

Yes, I have to compile all my thoughts and put it into writing. Here are some of them:

Family:
Well, it's been a long time that I have not seen my family. A tad 6 years I guess. I miss them so very much. But in this Covid19 times it is impossible to travel across the Pacific Ocean and be greeted with a 14-day lockdown in the capital and in the islands. It will be futile. So I decided to cancel my flight for my October homecoming. Everything was been planned already and now that the second wave of the Covid19 infections had surged up, traveling was nearly impossible and less likely to happen.
******
My little sister is critically sick. She has diabetes and she is really stubborn. My cousin had messaged me through FB Messenger that she was coughing badly and it made me worried because of Covid19. I was so paranoid so I decided to send money to have her checked up. Good thing it was not Covid19. The cough was just due to acute bronchitis. However here BUN and creatinine were critically elevated which almost can be related to acute kidney injury or failure. I scolded her on the phone blaming her that she is not helping herself eating prohibited foods against her diabetes. She also had gained enormous amount of weight, and was not really compliant with her meds. I am very upset, worried, and mad about her mismanagement of herself. It seems that I need to get more convincing power to make her more mature and responsible for herself.
******
My nephew from Dubai had messaged me because she wanted to borrow $1000 from me because she doesn't have a dependable job right now because of the emergence of the pandemic. The warehouse that she worked at in Dubai had temporarily shut down of close because of the occurrence of pandemic. I told her that it is really a huge amount of money and I am also quiet tight at this time because all my savings was invested in the piggery project in the Philippines. It ended up I only gave her $200. I told her it's a gift not a loan. She was happy in the end.
******
Last July 11 was my foster parent's 76th birthday (Tita Cely's) and I called and spoke and talked to her on the phone for a tad long time. She was very happy because she received a lot of calls from her friends and families, and had obtained myriads of gifts and birthday greetings from all over the country from some of her acquaintances. She was also very ecstatic because I send her a beautiful flower cake and 3 mylar balloons with "Happy Birthday" greetings which she liked so much. I asked her to get some pictures and send it to me for me to see. She told me that she also liked the preserved roses I send her during Mother's Day in May and she said it is still looking fresh. Wow!

Projects:
Yeah, I have put up some of my savings for a big project with my cousins in Batangas. I have to provide the net capital and they will tend for the business for me. The project was a piggery. A huge huge and famous one. I have to buy 60 piglets and they will be fattened and grown for hauling and consumption after 4-5 months. I spend almost $6,000.00 in the beginning just to buy the piglets sans the feeds. For the feeds I have to put up and send $500.00 every week for 4-5 months until the pigs were ready to be reweighed and sold. It was a great gamble for me and hopefully, the Lord God will provide and help me with this very important project for me.

Vacay:
I just got back from a brief vacay from Las Vegas despite of the heightened level of Covid19 in the state. I flew and left Los Angeles because I was extremely so stressed out. I booked a room at the Treasure Islands Hotel along the strip and just slept there all day long, watching my favorite Netflix shows, and then eat at some of the chic restaurants enjoying the food and the place. I even met my best friend and her daughter and we ate dinner at Cut Resto at the Palazzo Hotel. I am fully recharged when I got back to Los Angeles not really ready to come back to work. Hehehe.
******
I canceled all my two pending flights or trips in September to Switzerland and in October to the Philippines because it is highly unlikely that I can enjoy it because of the surge of Covid19 in the United States and around the world. Because of this most of the European countries will not accept tourists from America for the meantime. I was heavily penalized or inadvertently charged for a big fee due to the cancellation, but what can I do. I just don't want to gamble myself and regrettably lose a job when I come back in the mainland. Money gone to waste but I hope it is the right decision to make at this time. I mean it is not practical to get penalized but it is the right thing to do. At least I got back some or part of the money I paid initially.

Work:
Well, I've been assigned again to a Covid19 patient... my second Covid19 patient (please see previous blog). Well, work is work... I cannot do anything about it. I just wanted to have this shift get over and then go home. T'was a nice night though and I had survived the whole shift anyway. Bravo to me! Alas... I hope I did not contract the virus. Hehehe.
********
I also made a complaint at the payroll department lately because they did not pay me for two days of work regarding the extra day premium I did in the past and a one day for new hire RN orientation and preceptorship. Lindsay was kind enough to have spotted the mistake. Thank you Lindsay!!! Another complaint I made to Lindsay was the Covid19 Hazard Pay was not also reflected in my pay stub. Lindsay told me that Tammie had not okayed the premium yet. I told her that it was announced during our daily huddle that the nurses assigned to the Covid19 patients will be given a $5 per hour hazard premium. Lindsay told me that she will approach Tammie again.

-- END OF STORY --

Night Dreaming

Here I am at work, have nothing to do but dawdle and blog again. All my routines were been carefully done and my patients were been tucked away well and slept like a baby. It was an eerie quiet night. Much better than the boring night I had last night with the Covid19 patient.

At least I am really chilling real good and not having to worry about the virus flying and floating in the air when I fearfully entered the room. I felt like a paranoid blimp last night, had doubled up my head caps, doubled up my gowns, doubled up my shoe covers, made sure that my scrubs have no rips and holes, had doubled up my masks (surgical mask at the bottom, N95 mask on top) and lastly tripled up my gloves (small underneath, medium in the middle, and large on top). What a waste! Hahaha... isn't it hilarious?

Well, these days there were always a lot of uncertainties.... and I felt like I am Heisenberg (the Lord of Uncertainty). Actually, we don't know when will this pandemic will gonna end. And it is uncertain indeed! But the odds were too uncertain but I am certain it will end in an uncertain eventuality. Redundant... isn't it?

Oh, how I wish I could be traveling in Europe again by this time. I miss my lonely strolls in the streets of Paris and London, my unwinding adventures in the subways and railroad tracks in London, Paris, and Italy, my solo coffee rendezvous in a vintage restaurant in Budapest and the unending sipping of scorching hot tea in a medina in Marrakech, Fez, Casablanca, Essaouira, and Rabat, my giddy dancing in Old Town Square in the bustling city of Prague and the enormous zocalo in Mexico City, my unpredictable musings in the less crowded streets of Berlin, my castle and cathedral chasing in Austria, Romania, Germany, Switzerland, France, Italy, Mexico, and everywhere, my swooning breaking point when I saw the handsome statue of David in Florence, my intrepid adventures in the souks of Chefchaouen and Casablanca, my greedy chocolate quenching adventures in Brussels, Antwerp, Lausanne, Geneva, and Brugges, my untimely oohs and aahs of the medieval towns and old streets in Romania, Bulgaria, and Thessaloniki, my strong willed odyssey of the ancient civilizations in Mexico and Greece, my cheesy escapades in Netherland and Switzerland, my crazy adventure when I hiked an active volcano in Ecuador while it's raining hail the size of marbles, my solo musings in the middle of Lake Atitlan in Panajachel, Guatemala, and many more colorful adventures that I've been through all these years.

At this time of pandemic, all that I do was to recall and reminisce all the nostalgic and memorable memories I've had. Oh I can't wait to go again to another place that I don't know to challenge myself of what to do and act at the same time, mingling with people and immersing with different cultures and mores.

Traveling had shaped my perspective of the world and the different people I've met. I became more aware of my surroundings, observing different behaviors and personalities which made me gauge my reactions when interacting in public. It made me more mature as an individual and made me more knowledgeable of the places that I've never been before. It also made me anticipate on what to do, making future plans and decisions to make my adventures more meaningful, memorable, and economical.

And yes, I just realized I am at work right now, working on a graveyard shift and night dreaming of my future escapades. Aah.... Covid19 had slowed down my (our) world and it's really hard to catch up now because everything doesn't come handy anymore. A lot of restrictions and regulations to follow for the benefit of everybody in general.


Aaah... maybe I was just selfish to think of myself with my previous travels when other people were having problems and difficulty supplementing their individual necessities at this very critical and crucial moment where most of the people around the globe doesn't have or is scrambling for a job. I am just fortunate enough that I have something to do and earn honestly at this very stressful circumstance in our history and detrimental part of our lives. Everybody's vulnerable I guess and so do I.

Canceling My Travel Plans

It's heartbreaking that I have to cancel all my travel plans for the coming months. I bought all those tickets with a discount thinking that the Covid19 situation will abate by the time I'm leaving for the travel but unfortunately it had gotten worst.

I am suppose to leave for Switzerland on 9/7/20 to 9/14/20 and to the Philippines on 10/5/20 to 10/27/20 but unluckily all the US citizens were banned in almost every country because of the surge in Covid19 cases currently all over the country. The curve was peaking and not flattening. It was very frustrating.

So tonight, I went to cancel both trips at the Justfly.com search engine where I bought it. They charge me 30%-40% for the penalty and it's hard to swallow the consequences.

I guess all my travel plans for the year 2020 might be on hold for the meantime because of this global pandemic that never stopped and has no solution at this moment. There were places that were back to lockdown and there were places that reopens cautiously fearing to initiate for another wave of spread.

The recent protests and riots by the "Black Live Matter" movement because of George Floyd's death was the key contributing factor for the emergence of the second wave. BLMs and Liberals blamed it on Trump because the latter did not do anything to abate the situation. That's what they claimed but to me I know what really happened.

Going back to my travel plans, well I just got back from a short getaway from Las Vegas just to unwind and escape the stressful issues from Los Angeles. It was a fleeting escape despite of the red alert Covid19 situation in the state of Nevada. I did enjoyed staying in my hotel watching Netflix and also strolling outside on the hot summer days when I got bored in my room.

It seems that my travel plans for this year will be on hold for an uncertain time but oh well, I hope it will be over soon so that I can resume what I used to do before. But it seems that it will take a while and it will not be as normal as before. That's my guess.... what's yours?

My Second Covid19 Patient

Last night, I was assigned to my second Covid19 patient. He is a 53-year-old male who was admitted several weeks already due to bowel perforation. His name is Fhroylahn Cahbhutho (was intentionally misspelled due to confidentiality reasons, and for my own record as well).

He had a history of testosterone replacement therapy due to his hypogonadism which his body did not tolerate thereby causing poratl vein, splenic vein, and superior mesenteric vein thrombosis and eventually bursts due to wall weakening which eventually led to bowel perforation with underlying peritonitis and sepsis.

He came to us Covid19 negative and was been in the facility for several weeks where he developed extremely high fever which was only thought to be sepsis because he has a diagnosis for sepsis. When the MD ordered to test him for Covid19 the result came back positive.

He was even surprised why he had Covid19 because he knew he was tested at Cedars before he left and he was negative. How in the heck he got the virus while staying in the East Unit for a while.

For the record, he is on room air and was breathing fine, no complaints of headache, nor diarrhea, no respiratory problems, no anosmia and loss of appetite. Was noted to be euthermic and only complained that he was sweating occasionally.

Naturally, he was placed on total isolation and was assigned to only one nurse (which unfortunately happened to be me). I clustered all his care and attended to his needs so that I will only spend a minimal amount of exposure with him despite wearing the gears or PPE's for the Covid19. Of course I have to wear N95 mask, bonnet, shoe covers, gloves (doubled up), face shield and goggles, aprons, etc. Also observing proper handwashing technique and use of sanitizers when the hands are not really soiled.

Thorough precautions was observed and I always made sure that his colostomy bag was emptied so as not to have leaked it out to the skin resulting in changing the bag and also emptying the urinal with urine because he frequently voids in it.

He is an easy patient and has no complaints other than medicating him of his Dilaudid for pain every 4 hours PRN as ordered for moderate pain. He is not a complainer and was chill. I had a good night with this assignment. Thank God!

My First Covid Patient

Today, I was assigned with a 91-year-old female Covid19 patient. Her name is Lheonhorah Cuhrrahn (intentionally misspelled for confidentiality reasons).

When I got to work this evening, I saw myself being assigned 1-on-1 with the patient in Room 30. This was the second positive Covid19 patient in our facility. She was an ex-covid patient at Cedars Sinai Medical Center, was discharge Covid19 negative after 2 swabs but for some reasons was positive again when she was swabbed on admission her at Kindred.

I did not expected to be assigned again with a Covid19 patient because I had admitted an ex-Covid patient from the adjacent room in Room 31. Then today they assigned me again. We'll see tomorrow if they assigned me. Hopefully not!

Well, basically I have one patient tonight. A total care patient due to her Covid19 status. She is AAO x3, kinda confuse due to her dementia. She is uncooperative, always took off her nasal cannula despite being tachypniec. She was really not participating in her care. But better right now because it seems that she is not having respiratory patients just like other Covid19 patients. Not on ventilator either, thank God!

I will be taking care of her for the whole 12-Hr shift but I will intend to cluster the care to make her more time to rest for her recuperation. She doesn't look contagious but with the notoriety of the virus don't have to be relaxed about it. I know more precautions should be initiated and that I have to be careful when entering the room. I am scared but it is challenging.

She feels lonely inside but I tried my best to ease her loneliness and depression by talking to her as much as possible without getting near her. She's able to follow simple commands and that is all right with me. In the end what is really needed is good communication and understanding so that care can be delivered efficiently and accordingly.

Hopefully, I can sail through the whole shift and that nothing will happen to me. I've been paranoid now but who doesn't? Anyway, whatever happens it will e unto my way of protecting myself. Yeah!

What's Wrong With The World

Starting the chaos because of an ex-convict's death. I mean it's just not black people lives matters. Everybody lives matter. There were more martyr that we can mourn and raise high but not a black person who uses a counterfeit $20 bill and with some bad record in the past.

I mean the policeman Chauvin was at fault for hold choking him but it's not right to glorify George Floyd because he died of that choke hold. He is a criminal and shouldn't not be made into a hero posthumously. It's nonsense to me.

And people of Minneapolis started to protest and then they lot and burn the whole city. I mean, how can you do that to your neighborhood? The place they live in? That's a shame because their city is burned down now. And the city government is facing a big problem on how to recover.

Another problem is the rampant gathering all over the nation which is a threat to another wave of Covid19 infections which was still on the rise. People protesting and rioting without face covering? I guess America will be doomed.

I was watching a video of a looting in downtown Los Angeles where they ransacked the jewelry district. It was really chaos. Another video I watched was regarding the Wells Fargo Bank where the rioters took of the board at the door and then smashed the windows for 15 minutes and then when it gave way they went in and the video was done. I don't know if they got some money inside?

With these happening around us it is disheartening and frustrating. Ruining a city you live in is bad. No fear of the teachings of God and respect of other people. What kind of generation does America have today..... a generation of looters and criminals? Aaaah... it is so out of this world.

When Things Go Wrong

Throughout our life we have had instances that the situation was kinda not in favor of our agenda, where sometimes you feel that everything is unfair, where you feel isolated and abandoned and no one is on the rescue, that you feel that the whole world is against and ran away from you or will fall upon you, that you're downtrodden and you're all alone, and many more instances that makes your life difficult. But always remember that all these happens for a reason.

God will often use negative situation in life in order to develop within His children a greater resolve, refinement, and maturity (James 1:3; Romans 5:3-4). Whenever sovereignty allows something that is not pleasant, always remember that it is also not random. It was allowed for a reason. God always has a reason for what He does to us, or for what He allows us. As Lamentations 3:32 tells us, "For if He causes grief, then He will have compassion according to His abundant loving kindedness".

We can understand this passage better when we reflect on it through the lens of a parent. If you are a parent and have ever disciplined one of your children, you know that the grief caused in the method of discipline was not intended for the purpose of hurting your child. If your child was grounded from attending any fun activities due to disobedience to you, you chose that form of punishment in order to teach your child a greater lesson. This greater lesson was also sought out with the intention of it keeping your child from future harm. The discipline is never fun, loving parents will always follow it up with compassion.

Similarly, God does not discipline us out of a spirit of meanness or malice. His discipline of His children comes couched with compassion and the desire for us to mature such a degree that we keep from needing further discipline in the future.